Here are some jokes taken from Telechron's Company Newsletter, the Synchronuze and Telechron dealer's magazine, Telechronicle.  (General Electric's newsletters contained no humor whatsoever.)  Jokes especially in the Synchronuze (on the OH BOY page) often often used the names of Telechron employees to personalize them.


Mr. Davis and Mr. Carpenter staying at the Hotel Commodore Perry were, on their first night, disturbed by a great noise in the room above them--the sound of someone running about.  They did not interfere, however, thinking it would not occur again.

The second night it was quite as bad.

On the third night it varied; being a series of heavy bumps.

This decided them; they went upstairs and asked the inmate of the room the reason for the din.

"It is only medicine" A.J. Frank says, "It is a good deal harder for me than it is for you."

"Medicine!"  "Surely it isn't as hard to take as all that."

"Yes it is, the doctor ordered me to take it two nights running then skip the third night and that it what I'm trying to do."  (all three worked for Telechron)

-   -   -

"L" Guard (at the front of the car)"  "Ridgeland Avenue next!  Ridgeland.
"L" Guard (at rear of car)"  "Same Here!"

-   -   -
"There are some things I can always count on."
"What are they?"
"My fingers."
-   -   -
Traffic Cop:  "What's your name?"
Truck Driver"  It's on the side of me wagon."
Cop: (trying to read name): "It's obliterated."
Driver: "Yer a liar.  It's O'Brien."
-   -   -
Junkman:  "Any rags, paper, old iron?"
Man of the house: "No, my wife's away."
Junkman:  "Any bottles?"
-   -   -
"What time is it, dear?"
"The clock has stopped." (obviously, not a Telechron)
"Well, go out and look at the sundial."
"But it's dark out there in the garden."
Well, can't you get a flashlight?"
-   -   -

"How is it," asked the police magistrate of a culprit haled before him for robbery, "that you managed to take this man's watch from his vest pocket when it was secured by a patent safety catch?"

"My fee, your honor," replied the man politely and with dignity, "is $10 for the full course of six lessons."

-   -   -


The girl:  "Why do you close your eyes so tightly when you kiss me?"
Russell:  "I'm trying to imagine that you are Greta Garbo."

-   -   -

Mr. Durmer calling on Mr. Chase shortly after Christmas, "Oh, you have a new saxophone."
Mr. Chase, "No, I just borrowed that from Harry Whitehead."
Mr. Durmer, "What did you borrow it for?--you can't play."
Mr. Chase, "Neither can he while I've got it."

-   -   -

Wifie:  "Oh, Fred, the baby has swallowed the matches.  What shall I do?"
Husband:  "Here.   Use my cigarette-lighter."

-   -   -

Elroy Grout, the shy young man in the Motor Assembly Dept. wanted to propose to one of his lady loves but never dared.  Finally, he took her to to his family lot in the cemetery and said: "Wouldn't you like to be buried here some day?"


George Snow:  What do you call a man who drives a car?
Perry Holden:  That depends on how close he comes to me.

-   -   -
Man:  "I have a cold or something in my head"
Another:  "A cold undoubtedly."
-   -   -
Officer:  (to couple in parked auto) "Don't you see the sign, 'Fine for Parking'?"
Steven Klaus:  "Yes, officer, I see it and I heartily agree with it."
-   -   -
Man:  "So you desire to be my son-in-law?"
Young Man:  "No, I don't.  But if I marry your daughter, sir, I don't see how I can get out of it."
-   -   -
Aunt Hetty:  "Sakes alive!  I don't believe no woman could get so fat."
Uncle Hiram:  "What y' readin' now, Hetty?"
Aunt Hetty: " Why, this paper tells about an Englishwoman that lost two thousand pounds."
-   -   -
One:  " I said your ship would come in this week.  Was I correct?"
Two:  "Well partly.  My salary was docked."


"Are you sure the defendant was drunk?" asked the judge.
"No doubt, your honor" replied Harry Davis.
"Why are you so certain?"
"Well", replied officer Davis, "I saw him out a penny in the fire box in front of Telechron then look up at the clock on the factory and shouted 'Gawd, I've lost fourteen pounds.'"

-   -   -
Professor (sternly)- "When the room settles down I will begin the lecture."
C. Davies - "Why don't you go home and sleep it off?"
-   -   -
Bernard - "What are all those trunks doing over there by the stage door?"
Thayer - "Why, those are the chorus girls' clothes."
Bernard - "Let's go to another show."
-   -   -
Estelle - "Is that a birthmark you have there?"
Leo - "Oh, yes, I got this getting into the wrong berth in a sleeper."
-   -   -
Frank Mangan:  "Will you give me something for my head?"
Druggist:  "I wouldn't take it as a gift."
-   -   -
Beautiful Saleslady:  "Could I interest you in a Packard?"
Henry Frank: "Lady, you could interest me if you were in a second-hand flivver."